Sep 212015
 

Are you a songwriter? Oh, that’s cute. Well, you might be call one, but chances are high that you suck at it. Of course it doesn’t stop the majority (of us) to keep it happening. Because most people just don’t realize their songwriting skills are questionable. So all you song crafting geniuses, this reality check is for you.

Overused chord progressions

lame songwriter monkeyBecause nothing screams “I suck at this” more, than an endless stream of those I-V-vi-IV choruses. In every single tune you write. Doing so is a dead giveaway that you approach songwriting from the chordal side. No matter what your cover story is, I can tell that you right away that you came up with the chord progression first. And little more later. What’s even more sad is, the chord progressions you have used are present in most of the current, forgettable hits. You’re such a hipster. Create some memorable melodies instead. I dare you, n00b!

Complexity for the sake of complexity

This is the case when you’re a guy who comes from the technical side of things. Which of course means no emotions. Unless you accidentally stumble upon them (not likely). The song will have everything in it, from the neighbor’s dog to the kitchen sink. Weird chord changes, tempo and time signature alterations, half-a-million notes that require a certain technical proficiency to play on his chosen instrument. The problem is, the listener won’t be able to decode it, no matter how hard they try. Way to create an incoherent, unmusical mess.

It’s all about the lyrics

Yeah, because you think you have a way with words. So you write down an excessive amount of them, creating long songs that have nothing memorable about them. Especially not musically. You think words alone can carry a song? You’re wrong. Where’s the balance? Are you a fucking poet? Of course you suck at that, too. That’s why you’ve become a songwriter.

”Let’s write one like…”

Let’s not! You bloody copycat. You keep stealing someone else’s style altogether. Clearly a sign that you’re lacking the talent to develop your own. It’s okay to be influenced, it’s okay to steal from here and there. But when you do it that obviously, it means you don’t want to even try and be creative. Stop being so enamoured of your musician hero.

”I’m a follower”

Oh you cool hipster, who want to ride the current waves of musical trends. Whatever waves they are. It’s because basically you are nothing else but a fucking attention whore. So you write songs that are considered hip, in at least a certain community. Usually the largest one. That’s why you copy all of the stylistic elements of that crap. Why? Because you are scared to be original. But first and foremost, you’re scared to be alone.

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